I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
the day after is always just damage control
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Randomize
