Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
