I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize