brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
