That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Last time i carry you out of a forest
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
