Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
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