Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize