I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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