my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
