you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
