But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
