so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
