and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
