I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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