My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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