Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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