i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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