Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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