Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
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