he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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