We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
