woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?