garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
They took my balls.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
