Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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