I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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