your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
