S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
