She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
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