So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize