I will die if light touches me.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize