and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
The adults are the big ones right?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
