dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
