In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
sex in a hospital.. check
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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