glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize