Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Randomize
