i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
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