Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
worst night to have a conscience
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize