it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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