Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize
