dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
