He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
