I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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