Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
