He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Randomize
