i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
In America we eat man semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
When did angry sex become our thing?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize