I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
