We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
