I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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