her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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