her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
i believe in u and ur pee
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
