but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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